Windsday

Simon really loves windy days. Whenever it is windy, I take him out to fly planes and occasionally sail ships. On National Windsday he helped me build a turbine. However, we couldn't get it to work. On the other hand, I am generally not a fan of wind or drafts of any kind. I believe my dislike stems from an 8 year old's bitterness.

In fourth grade, we had a teacher named Mr. Zeilant. He was the sort of teacher who would breed competitiveness in his students. For example, he ritualistically walked around the room with his stamp grading scale, giving each person the appropriate number of stamps to signify how pretty their spelling homework appeared. Everyone silently and nervously counted his hand motions as he systematically marked the marble notebooks, student by student. I loved to hate homework in Mr. Zeilant's class. One of my classmates, Jennifer, claimed indifference to the glory of stampage and said she valued her play time at home more than beautifying her pages. One day Jennifer raised her hand in class; follows is the gist of the question and response that might irritate me to this day.

"If you're standing next to a building so that you're in the shade, doesn't it mean that if the wind is blowing in the same direction as the sun, you won't feel it? So as long as you're in the shade you are protected by the wall?"

"Yes Jennifer! You are a super genius! I am so proud of you! Fifty million stamps to you!"

Now, granted, as maybe this is true, I've thought about it for decades and fail to see the brilliance of this logic. Since when do light particles and wind follow the same rules of physics? Keep in mind that I almost couldn't get into medical school due to my horrid scores on the physics section of the MCAT. In a world of magic and whimsy, I don't need physics. Perhaps this explains our turbine problems.