When I left for class today I forgot to give Buddy his diazepam before the storm came. Consequently his anxiety-induced barking and howling caused Simon to scream and cry, which led to Dion's stress-induced temporary loss of brain function. I'm sure it was at this point that my husband with a spatial IQ of 164 couldn't fit all of the dirty dishes into the dishwasher before he started it.
Around 2pm I heard the alarm sound, indicating the entrance of a package delivery truck onto the premises. I order things online when I get bored or when I feel priceless; mostly the latter. I also enjoy having strange men visit my house and give me things. Today, I received my Anthony Bourdain autographed photograph and my Brazilian begonias. Evidently I order miniature versions of autographed pictures and tremendous jumbo packages of flowers, hypothesizing a correlation with the computer screen making everything look the same size. So then, during this disenchantment, Simon began nibbling on the dog food.
Still, I managed not to break my foot again on my trek down the college stairs in my platforms by only the light of the ... well, rain clouds. I realized I had tricked fate when I heard "This Love" by Maroon 5 two times on the radio via channel surfing during my 15 minute ride home. For anyone unfamiliar, it was this masterpiece that inspired the awkward gyrations leading to the original snap of my 5th right metatarsal, on the eve of my sister's dance recital.
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